Someday.

"They say the bigger the investment, the bigger the return. You have to understand that you might lost everything, but if you put in the effort, you might be surprised by the results." -Grey's Anatomy.
I don't care how long it takes. I don't care if it kills me. I don't care if it's the hardest thing I'll ever have to do. Since I was 12, I've wanted to go into performance. And while I've done a lot of skipping around and shifting to other, more reliable careers, that one wish has never changed.
I know it might never happen, regardless of how hard I try. I know I might be just setting myself up for disappointment. But I don't care. Because if I don't try with everything I have, I know for a fact that it will never happen.
"It's hard to wait on something you know might never happen. But it's even harder to give up when you know it's everything you want."
Someday. Someday my job will be with a symphony. Someday, I will be performing if it's the last thing I do. I just didn't realize how much I wanted it until now...

Pep Rally and BRRRRR.

Tonight was the homecoming football game where I'm student teaching. This afternoon we had a pep rally, during which the football team captain spoke. It's been raining nonstop for the past two days, and he was trying to encourage everyone to come to the game regardless of the yucky weather. How did he do that, you ask?
(This is a direct quote)
"We all like it wet and sloppy!!"
...I cannot describe how much effort it took for me to bite my tongue and not retort "that's what she said" while surrounded by my students and cooperating teacher.
*sigh*
In other news, I am currently in my dorm. Wearing a sweater *and* a hoodie, a scarf, and socks and slippers. And I have goosebumps. Because the heat in my dorm has not been turned on yet. The current temperature outside is 47. Tomorrow, I am getting an indoor thermometer so I can see just how cold it is in here.
BRRR!!!!!

Dear Autumn,

I was very excited for you, with cold weather and falling leaves, until you came and I remembered how much crap started happening this time last year. Please go by quickly.
Some love,
Rachel.

Long time no update. Life isn't completely bad.
More crap has happened, of course. I didn't make wind ensemble this year. 7 other seniors who have been members of W.E. for the past 2 or 3 years didn't make it, either. In fact, there are more freshmen in W.E. instead of symphonic band this year. Long story short, there is lots of anger(and stories, and theories...if anyone wants to hear them, feel free to inquire). So, instead of going on the European tour with W.E. this May, I'm going on a Literary Tour of England. The trip is going to rock, I am determined of it. Also, I'm getting a new flute (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!), and my senior recital is going to kick butt if it kills me in the process. In fact, I just got my recital music. It might.
FYI-my current recital date is Saturday, 3/27 at 3PM, if anyone would like to attend. =] (I would recommend the recital over band concerts this year) Music includes Copland's Duo for Flute and Piano, Katherine Hoover's Winter Spirits, Bach's 1st Sonata, and Demersseman's 6th Solo de Concert.
None of my laundry has been recovered. I'm not surprised.
In happier news, student teaching has been fantastic. My birthday was pretty darn happy, too...and there's only 244 days until graduation! Yahoo!
Also, the new flute might potentially be my dream flute...a Miyazawa. It'll probably cost around $5,000...or more....but, it would be worth it (as well as the last flute I'd ever have to buy). *longing sigh*
Homecoming at student teaching this week. Homecoming at Wartburg week after next. AKA busy busy busy...

Dear person who stole my laundry:

I strongly dislike you. What the hell were you thinking?!? Neither I nor my parents had the money to replace all that stuff right now! What on Earth could you gain by swapping someone else's clothes?!? Have fun with three weeks' worth of my old underwear! Seriously, what the freaking heck??????
Too much anger for words,
Rachel.
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Yup. That's right. I had TWO FULL LOADS of laundry stolen yesterday right out of the dryer, along with my hamper. But they left the dryer sheets.
I cannot express how angry I am right now. I did not need to spend any more money as of late. That was SO FREAKING DUMB!!!! MORON!!!! GAH!
So far, all the RAs in my building know, as well as the RHD, I've filed reports with Wartburg Security and the Waverly Police, I wrote a facebook note and tagged 15 people, I've talked to three other people in person, I emailed the maintenance lady for this building, and I'm informing the local thrift store tomorrow (in case they donate stuff to get if off of their hands) as well as putting an ad in the Trumpet and making an announcement to both bands. Oh, and the RAs and I knocked on everyone's doors yesterday just to see if anyone noticed anything. And we searched the building and dumpsters.
I AM SO PISSED RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So, today I had to do some major shopping. Because all but two pairs of underwear are gone, as well as all of my jeans. I didn't do too bad, really, only about $230 for 3 pairs of jeans, 7 shirts, 2 washcloths, 3 weeks' worth of underwear, 2 pairs of pajama pants, a hoodie, and a new hamper. It hasn't replace every single last bit of clothing I lost, but it'll tide me over very well for the time being.
Happiest purchase: super super fuzzy AE hoodie for about $17 instead of $30-something. Seriously, fuzziest hoodie I've ever worn. (BTW, I fit in an xs...I haven't fit in an xs since before college. Strange. I think they run a little big...)
Next time I do laundry, I am not leaving the laundry room for any amount of time at all.
Freaking jerks.

Long time, no post...

Well, life over the past two weeks has been pretty good. I am completely and entirely moved into Wartburg for the last time, and there are only 277 days until gradation! =D
Student teaching started the week before last. It's been busy, and tiring, but oh man has it been amazing. The students are great, and my cooperating teacher and I get along very well. It's really a great feeling to know that I'm doing the right thing with my life.
I've been giving all of the flute lessons as of late, and those have been going fantastically-in fact, giving lessons no longer makes me nervous at all, which is a first. Happiez, ah haz dem. =D
But, of course, not so good things always seem to have to happen.
My mom and I have a mutual friend who she works with. On Sunday, her husband Tom had an aneurysm. He's only 44, and had no health problems before Sunday morning. At first it seemed like he started to improve a little-he survived a 12 hour long surgery, and made it up to a 50/50 chance of survival, and was getting close-ish to being taken off of the breathing tube. But, as of today, his organs have started to shut down. As of right now, his chance of survival is about 2%. They have two daughters in high school. He was perfectly healthy a week ago. It's just crazy. So, any good thoughts anyone can send their way would be helpful.
Otherwise, life over here is pretty good. I'm still the only person on my floor, but orientation starts next week, so it won't be for very long. It's kind of weird and nice for it to be so quiet, but sometimes creepy at night. But, I finally have a meal plan, so no more mac and cheese every night clumsily made in my room. Huzzah! =] One thing I won't miss is the mensa, but it does come in handy when I don't have a kitchen.
Also, there's band and choir drama already. School hasn't even started yet! *eyeroll* it's going to be an interesting year...

Update.

Snoopy does NOT need surgery.
His back is worse, but all he needs to do is take it easy, and survive four different kinds of meds, each with a different dosing schedule. Seriously. My mom's got the next month planned out for which doggie meds on which days. It's insane.
Basically, Snoops will always have back problems from here on out and will probably be on and off meds forevermore, but if he takes it easy when things start to hurt and we get him in ASAP when things start to hurt and get him on meds, he should be perfectly fine.
THANK GOD.
One battle down, five million to go...

Dear life,

You freaking suck right now. Quit throwing so much crap at us. And quit making Snoopy worse. I WILL hunt you down with a baseball bat, that's a promise.
No love at all,
Rachel
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Snoopy has a back problem that he's on meds for. All of the sudden, out of nowhere tonight he can't walk on his left legs. He's going to the vet tomorrow. There's a good chance this will require surgery. Which will be $3,000-4,000, which we can't afford, which will probably mean putting him down.
He's four years old.
If that's what happens, it will probably absolutely kill my brother, who is starting high school next week and has been coming home to Snoopy every day since the 6th grade.
Honestly...enough crap has happened to us on a consistent enough basis for the past two years. Seriously.
Angries. Ah haz dem. >=[